I had occasion this week, thanks to an invitation to preach on the subject of pastoral care, to remember one of the most helpful spiritual practices I learned years ago at a training for lay pastoral ministers. As with all good lessons, this one begins with a story.

 

A young man came to learn from a wise monk. Yet in the monk's presence, the young man sought to impress him with all that he already knew. While the monk quietly served tea, the young man kept talking, until he noticed that the teacup was filled to the brim. The monk kept pouring until tea spilled from the cup onto the floor.

 

“Stop!” the young man cried. “No more will go in!”

 

“YOU are like this cup,” the monk replied. “How can I teach you unless you first empty your cup?”

 

Whenever we enter a relationship with another, be it in conversation, a meeting, or time with our families, we do well to take a moment first to empty our cup; to catch our breath, say a brief prayer of emptying and release, in order to create space within ourselves for the other person. In so doing, we also make space within and between us for Christ, allowing the healing, consoling, challenging presence of Christ to do what we cannot.

 

It's a small thing, really, the practice of emptying our cup. But it can make all the difference in the ways we are open to one another and the presence of Christ.

 

In the words of the medieval mystic Julian of Norwich:

 

“No one listens, they tell me,

And so I listen

And I tell them

What they have just told me,

And I sit in silence,

Listening to them,

Letting them grieve.

‘Julian, you are wise,’

They say,

‘You have been gifted

With understanding.’

All I did was listen.

For I believe full surely

That God's spirit

Is in us all...”