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By Diane Ney
Washington Window
Vol. 73, No. 11, November 2005
Lila Wolff is chairwoman of the Diocesan Retreat Committee, which will sponsor its Advent retreat at the Cathedral College, Dec. 2-4, with the Rev. Nancy C. James. (For more information, visit the spirituality section of the diocesan Web site, edow.org.) Here she speaks with writer Diane Ney about silent retreats.
What is it about the experience of a silent retreat that appeals to you?
It's the opportunity to be alone with God and become re-centered in Him. It's the most restorative, reinvigorating, expansive experience. It's like a cleansing of one's interior self. A time to be still and listen and "cast your burdens on the Lord." There are some wonderful phrases in the Bible that describe it, such as "Come unto me all ye who travail and are heavy laden and I will give you rest," and in Psalm 46, "Be still and know that I am God."
Does it take more than one silent retreat to get that sense of stillness and peace?
Well, the first time I ever went on a silent retreat was 35 years ago, and I was hooked immediately. I think most people are. It's like a vaccination that takes. I'll read you what one new retreatant wrote recently: "I feel blessed that I had the opportunity to spend one-on-one time with God. It was quality time, nourishing time and discovery time. The retreat helped me to open some locked doors to my soul and welcome in the Lord."
How silent are the retreats?
Our retreats aren't totally silent. We have a retreat conductor who gives a series of five short meditations, on Friday night, Saturday morning, Saturday afternoon and evening, and Sunday morning. We also come together for services, Morning Prayer, Holy Eucharist, Evening Prayer and Compline. We eat our meals in silence, except for Friday dinner and Sunday lunch, and read, pray, meditate and rest. The silence allows retreatants to be with God. In some ways, I think of a retreatant as looking into a kaleidoscope. You look at the world differently.
In what way?
I think that when we spend this time with God, open our lives to his grace and invite him into all aspects of our lives, we open ourselves to new ways of being. I find that when I allow God to bring things to the surface, I come away with deeper faith, greater self-awareness and the ability to see the world with more compassion. I'm more aware of unseen possibilities and gentle, compassionate responses. It's as though the compass of my life is more truly pointing North.
Do the retreats focus on particular themes?
Yes, we have them twice a year, at Lent and at Advent, so they follow themes related to those seasons of the Christian year.
What's the Advent theme for this year?
"Standing in Our Whirlwinds," the whirlwinds of joy, courage and peace, as described by the retreat conductor, the Rev. Nancy C. James. The retreat will be at the Cathedral College, Dec. 2-4, and will focus on finding God in what's been called "the holy quiet." We will meditate on the different aspects of quiet and on the spirituality of God dwelling within our relationships with others.
You mentioned meditating. Does a person have to know how to meditate in order to participate in the retreat?
No, all you need to know is how to keep quiet. I know some would think that's difficult and even threatening, but once they try it, they love it. And the thing that allows them to truly be with God is the quietness, the stillness.
In the quiet you can finally hear God.
Exactly. The quiet and beauty of the Cathedral College and the beautiful grounds of the cathedral provide a wonderful environment to be with God. In the Cathedral College, each person has a private room, and this increases opportunities for prayer, rest and spiritual renewal.
Would everyone feel comfortable at a retreat? All ages, all backgrounds?
Yes, we always have a great diversity. We have many repeat customers, but we also want new retreatants, of course. It's just a very wonderful way for anyone to be with God and it's unlike any other way. It's different than going to church.
Well, church is a community experience, whereas this is very individual.
Oh, but we think of this as a community experience. You'd be surprised at how strong the bond is. You're in a prayer-filled space together and there is a wonderful connection. You can feel it.
I understand you have financial assistance for those who would like to participate but may not be able to afford it.
Yes, we have Diocesan Retreat Committee scholarships made possible by two grants from All Souls Memorial Episcopal Church and by donations from retreatants. People are welcome to contact us about these scholarships by going to the spirituality menu on the diocesan Web site, edow.org. They can also call me at 202/362-5067. And I should note that we provide information about all aspects of our retreats at the Diocesan Convention and in Washington Window and the Church House News bulletin.
Is there a possibility of more than two retreats next year?
We're looking into that and have met with Bishop Chane. He and the diocesan staff have been very supportive. We're eager to introduce more people to the experience of a silent retreat. It's just a wonderful thing and so restorative. One is opened to grace through that holy stillness.
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